Have you ever had a song come on the radio that suddenly put you right back to a particular place or time? Or has a song brought up a long-forgotten memory? I was listening to the radio today as I was putting on my makeup when Brad Paisley's Letter to Me came on the air. It's a poignant song detailing all the things that a man would like to put in a letter for his younger self to read, if he could. One of the things he talks about is how that devastating breakup with a girlfriend at seventeen becomes a blessing when viewed in hindsight years later.
It immediately took me back years to a time when my son was finishing up high school and getting ready to head off to college. He had just broken up with his girlfriend and it wasn't his choice to do so. He was heartbroken. Believe me, there are few things worse than seeing your child hurting so much and wanting to just make it all better as a mother, but knowing that some things will just take time.
What I WAS able to do was to sit down with him and reaffirm what a great guy he was and to tell him that, even though he couldn't see it now, it was all part of God's bigger and better plan for him because somewhere out there was a young woman who was going to be just the right person for him. I told him that I knew this was hard to believe at this moment in time but that he had to just cling to that hope (and trust his mom, who had been around the block a few more years and times than he had and who had experienced more than a few breakups of her own before meeting the right guy). I told him other things, things like what type of personality I thought the girl for him should have. He's a feeler and I told him that the last thing he needed was a girl who was standoffish or unemotional or saw everything through a wall of logic. He needed someone who was filled with joy, who loved to laugh and hug, someone who cared passionately about the things he cared for. I told him that the hurt he was feeling wouldn't go away through force of will or quickly. It would take time. Someday, though, he'd look back and see the wisdom in the breakup.
The college years went by in a blur and soon our son was off working with the poor here and abroad. One day we got a phone call telling us that he'd met a girl. She was "the one." It didn't take me long to see that he was right. If I had written up a "job description" for a wife and helpmate for my son, this young lady would have met every criteria. He was blessed and we were thankful that God had brought them together.
Today we are STILL feeling blessed and thankful that these two found each other. We couldn't love our daughter-in-law any more if she was our own natural-born daughter. We have two fantastic grandchildren. And I'm so happy for that breakup years ago because two young people went on to find the right life partners for themselves and have great families of their own now.
1 comment:
You are such a great mom! Wonderful words of wisdom for your hurting boy. And such love for your new daughter!
As to your first question - often a song will take me back to a certain place or time...but usually, the song had been playing at the time I'm remembering. (Did that make sense?)
PS Brad Paisley is my favorite country singer! Love that song!
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